5 Very Good Reasons to Punch a Dolphin in the Mouth and Other Useful Guides by The Oatmeal

My rating: 4 of 5 stars


I received this as an ARC from netgalley.com

I don't know if I can stop laughing long enough to write this review!



Okay, so last week sometime Alyssa Milano posted on Twitter a thank you to The Oatmeal-the author of this book.



The next day, a friend wrote an awesomesauce review of this book.



At that point I realized that I HAVE to read this book. So while I know I usually review romances, this was too good to pass up.



I think that there wasn't a page where I didn't crack up. I now know what men do and say to each other in the men's room:



(not an excerpt)



"Hey bro what's up?"

"Chainsaws."

"Dude."

"Dude."

deep heartfelt groan as he finishes up.

"Dude, if you shake it too much you're playing with it."

"Nah, you gotta show it who's boss."



There's a section all about calling someone for tech support, and Holy Crap was it hysterical!!!! It's funny because it's true!



I learned lots of fun little tidbits like:



If your pony growls, it's not a pony, it's a lion. You should run.



How to hunt a unicorn.



How to prepare for when the zombies take over.



Hitler hated cats.



How to suck at Facebook.



How to suck at texting.



And of course, 5 very good reasons to punch a dolphin in the mouth







My favorite line from this entire book was:



"We can poop again!"



Coolest Words Used:



-bearodactyl

-kraken

-porta-potty

-man nipples



This book is absolutely worth the read, and the humor is epic. I mean seriously, where else will you find kittens armed with samurai swords? Seriously.



http://www.demonloversbooksandmore.com/2...



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This is what I'm reading right now, and let me tell you, it's full of awesome. For anyone who's ever heard of Beyonce, the Giant Metal Chicken, or of Jenny, the Bloggess, you will not want to miss this!

The Life She Left Behind by Maisey Yates

My rating: 3 of 5 stars


I haven't read a Harlequin since I was in high school, and you know what? They haven't changed all that much, which is kind of comforting.



Taj and Angelina had met a few years back, and fallen in love. Her father was a big time oil magnate who wanted Taj to marry Angelina to cement their business arrangement. Taj sees no problem with this.

Once Angelina realizes that she's being bartered in a business deal, she runs.



After creating her own life as nanny to a young prince, she sees Taj at a party, and she darts out of that room as fast as she can. Taj catches up with her and demands she tell him how becoming a servant was any better than becoming his queen. Angelina says that she can respect herself as a nanny. That was an awesome line.



But circumstances being what they are, they are, of course, thrown back together. Taj convinces Angelina to marry him, and they have to learn how to love each other, and they learn that the path tolove is not always smooth.



This was my first sheik read, and it was nice. I think this novella starts off strong, but I think that a few things happened too quickly for my taste. But it was a pleasant way to pass the evening.



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